Toilet Water with a Wine Chaser


Yesterday we left the youngest home alone for a little while. Upon returning, I notice a spill on the kitchen counter, on the opposite side from the sink and fridge. Not a spot where we usually pour drinks or spill ice cubes, so it was a bit unusual.

And, as everyone knows, in order to clean something up effectively, you should know what it is. For example, if it was water, I would have wiped it up with a paper towel. If it was Sprite or some other sugary beverage, I would have used a wet rag. If it was wine, I would’ve probably used a straw.

But the location of this had me puzzled, and I really didn’t know what it was or how it got there.

So, like any crazy practical woman would do, I dipped my finger in the spill and tasted it. Water. Good. Wipe it up and go on, and no point wondering for too long how it got there.

But a few minutes later, there was more water on the counter, so I looked up. I noticed some water on the bottom edge of the upper cabinet. My mind is trying to figure out how water got there. Did someone smack a cup or bottle of water on the counter, causing it to shoot up? Had it been a carbonated drink, the kid might have had a gusher, but it was water. Where was water coming from?

I looked further up, and there it was. Water dripping through the ceiling. Must be the water heater. Mr. Wonderful and I dash up the stairs and into the attic, but that’s not it. We move into the bathroom.

But the bathroom floor is dry. So we check under the sink. Dry. Then I feel the wet rug, and all the pieces of the puzzle fly into place in an instant. The boy overflowed the toilet. The boy tried to clean it up so we wouldn’t know. I just tasted potty water. Dirty potty water.

Yep. I drank what came out of one of these. (Thank you, Microsoft, for the royalty-free image.)

 

So now I have a new item on that list of Things I Never Thought I’d Do.

I drank a glass of wine to sanitize my mouth calm my nerves.   Then I got out the mop and bleach and cleaned it up. And now my kitchen and bathroom smell Clorox-fresh, and I’m out of wine.

*  *  *  *

This post was submitted to Yeah Write!

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64 thoughts on “Toilet Water with a Wine Chaser

  1. elinstebbinswaldal

    Priceless, you are a great story teller! I’d have been grabbing for a bottle of whiskey and I don’t even drink whiskey!

    Reply
  2. Cathy

    As soon as you said you tasted it I began to shudder. EWWWWWW. Did you go to the ER? 🙂 You are like a Seinfeld episode! Ah, family life. 🙂

    Reply
    1. Lisha Fink Post author

      Cathy, I have another story that is truly a Seinfeld episode. But I have to wait until the statute of limitations runs out before I share that one.

      Reply
  3. loisaltermark

    OMG Lisha, I am crying laughing — and throwing up in my mouth a little! Moral of the story: always keep a bottle of wine on hand for emergencies.

    Reply
    1. Lisha Fink Post author

      Yes, for emergencies. Gotta be prepared. 🙂
      This is an example of an experience that wasn’t at all funny when it was happening. But hindsight has made it hilarious.

      Reply
  4. Pingback: Toilet Water with a Wine Chaser | randomdotme

  5. Pingback: Guest Posts for 2013: #SoWrong | renée a. schuls-jacobson's blog

  6. Gina

    There is nothing that causes an “OH NO” panicked reaction like a water leak! My son’s overflows constantly into the foyer when it drips out of the can lights. Disgustingly funny post that had me cracking up the whole way through. I’m a wino, I mean lover of wine, as well! Looks like there’s a group of us here at Yeah Write!

    Reply
    1. Lisha @ The Lucky Mom Post author

      Yeah, there do seem to be a lot of us here from Yeah Write! As I told Stacie below, a lover of wine is an ‘oenophile.’ Much classier than wine lover, don’t you think? Now, back to the post… Teach your son how to use the shut off valve on the back of the toilet. I’m wishing I had done so last week.

      I read your Small Package post a couple of days ago. Lovely memory.

      Reply
    1. Lisha @ The Lucky Mom Post author

      Hey, I love a good pun. 🙂 Especially one with ‘crap’ in it. I briefly considered rinsing my mouth with bleach, but I figured the wine had both sanitizing capabilities and tranquilizing effects. Both were needed after that experience.

      Reply
    1. Lisha @ The Lucky Mom Post author

      Trust me, don’t go back and try to confirm it. You’ll be left with a queasy stomach for a long time. (But good blog fodder.)

      Waiting to hear from you on your follow up. Keep busy, keep living. ❤

      Reply
    1. Lisha @ The Lucky Mom Post author

      Yes it did, and yes it is! Laughing at myself is what keeps me sane.

      Loved your post about bacon, with one exception: Bacon bits are the bomb. I can get my kids to eat so many things if they have bacon bits on top.

      Reply
  7. Stacie

    I am sorry but I have to laugh. Have to. This was so well written too! Favorite line: If it was wine, I would’ve probably used a straw. I’m big into wine too – I love finding fellow wine lovers!

    Reply
    1. Lisha @ The Lucky Mom Post author

      Thanks, Stacie. Yeah, I’m proud of that line.

      I’ve started referring to myself and my fellow wine lovers by our fancy-schmancy name. We are oenophiles, lovers of wine. (That’s one of my descriptive words on my Twitter profile.) Sounds classy, no? 🙂

      Reply
  8. Larks

    LOL! I’m really sorry this happened to you but this post was great! Life is really gross sometimes, isn’t it? And thank God for wine.

    Reply
    1. Lisha @ The Lucky Mom Post author

      That seems to be a theme here. “Sounds like something I would do.” Oh, well. I seem to have made a bunch of new friends because of that little sip, so I’m calling that the silver lining of this nasty cloud.

      Loved your post about the pig tails! I loved my dad the same way. He could do no wrong!

      Reply
  9. Samantha Brinn Merel

    Ugh, my worst nightmare is coming home from somewhere and finding water dripping from somewhere in my house where water is most certainly not supposed to be dripping. I’m glad that you solved the mystery. I am simultaneously laughing and grossed out by the image of your tasting the liquid on the counter. Glad you had the wine to detox!

    Reply
    1. Lisha @ The Lucky Mom Post author

      And now the task remains on how to remove the stain from the ceiling. We had our ceilings refinished after Hurricane Katrina (roof leaked, and it rained inside). So it’s a bummer to have damage on them. But I have to fix it soon before the Little Dude sees the spot and has a guilt reminder. He feels pretty bad about the whole thing. Me, I’m still shaking my head in disbelief.

      Thanks for visiting, Samantha! Looking forward to checking out your place soon!

      Reply
    1. Lisha @ The Lucky Mom Post author

      I hate to waste good wine! And I’m finding it amusing at how many women are saying it sounded like something they would do, but no men. Not sure what to make of that observation. Thanks for stopping by, CF. That baby of yours sure is cute!

      Reply
  10. Anonymous

    I had to laugh because this story reminded me so much of 1) liquids in odd places in our home, and 2) the upstairs neighbors in our last apartment. My husband and I don’t have kids, but we have cats and any liquids in weird places are usually their doing. But with the neighbors I knew the water was coming from their bathroom, which was directly above ours. Yuck!!!! However, I didn’t taste it. lol

    Reply
      1. cheryl

        Well as you know I would not have tasted it sorry you did. gross. but i agree you need to show him the shut of valve. I learned that real quick with old folks living with you. Next time don’t taste what you not sure of. I would have been cleaning for ever. cheryl

        Reply

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