It’s been going on since before we were married. It started out of peer pressure, because everyone he knew was doing it. At first, I think it felt almost like work for him, but then it developed into real passion.
She became an official mistress about 20 years ago, when we were living in another state. No one knew us, and there was anonymity in our small Texas town. If he took off for a couple of hours, no one would notice, and I certainly wouldn’t ask around in public to find out where he’d been.
A couple of times over the years, I think he’s wanted to stop. But the desire always came back. So much so that I finally acknowledged it was part of him, and accepted it.
I got resentful when she took time away from me, but he always seemed to return a better man. It was as though she fulfilled a physical need and a spiritual one, both things he just couldn’t find with me.
Their times ranged from quickies in the afternoon to marathons lasting almost a full day. But even the briefest encounter could help him clear his mind and regain perspective. Seemed like a paradox to me, but I really didn’t have a choice. I even tried to join them a few times, but it just wasn’t right, and I retreated to give them their time.
They go all over together. Exploring unique parts of the city, and occasionally even traveling. I’ve learned not to try to talk him out of it once he’s got his mind set on it.
This morning when he said he was going out to spend time with her, I sighed. I had other plans for the day. But they’d have to wait. He needed her.
So I gave him my blessing, and he put on his shoes, and went running.